In memory of my grandmother

This morning my screen saver posted an image of my late grandmother that made me think of her. She has been gone for a year now and I still miss her.  She was the sweetest person I have ever met by a long shot. Every time I visited her house, she was the most gracious host, always smiling, always polite, and always curious about our lives and our successes.  Her infectious good spirit cheered everyone's heart.  Not once in my life did I see her get mad or raise her voice, even with the teasing of my grandpa or the rambunctiousness of her boys (and sometimes her grandchildren :). 

She was never disingenuous.  When she expressed interest in our lives (even the lives of us grandchildren when we were only 10 or 15 years old), we could tell she really found value in what we had to say or show her.  She would try our new TV shows - she would laugh at our jokes - she would cheers us on as we pursued our dreams.  

One of my favorite memories of her was at Christmas about 10 years ago, after a few drinks (one of the few times I saw her drink), she accidental bumped the wind chime above her sink.  She giggled and tapped it again and said "Oh, that sounds so pretty."  It was precisely this enjoyment in the little things in life that allowed her to be the special woman she was.

My heart nearly broke watching her body slowly degenerate from vibrant, lively woman I remember.  I, the 6 foot 6 inch giant towering over my grandmother who shrunk to under 5 feet in her final years, would have to bend almost in half to give her a hug that was always requested when I came for a visit.

Now that she is gone, I want to carry on her appreciation of life.  If I can apply her joy in the little things, I can honor her better than anything else I may do.  Grandma, this is for you! 

Hierarchy of values

After reading Kelly's (from Reepicheep's Coracle) hierarchy of values, I thought it would be fun/useful for me to identify my own optional value hierarchy.  I struggled with parts of this because my hierarchy of values changes by the context.  For example, I enjoy hanging out with friends, but not all the time.  Given the choice between reading or hanging out with friends, it will largely be equivalent.  If I've done a lot of reading, I would like to talk with someone about the books.  But I also want something to talk about, which reading supplies.  I also struggled with adding values such as personal health.  While it is very important that I stay healthy, its not so much an optional value as it is a requirement for living.  And often, its not something I pay attention to until I'm unhealthy (which luckily is not very often).

Here is my list so far:

1. My career
2. Family
3. Home improvements/maintenance
4. Reading good books
5. Hanging out with friends
6. Fitness
7. Philosophizing
8. Spreading good ideas
9. Playing video games
10. Wood working

Some people may be surprised that I list my career above family.  Truth is, without my career, I would not have the opportunity to enjoy my family.  Both the income and the satisfaction that comes from work are prerequisites for establishing pride in myself such that I can appreciate my family for who they are.  However, my family is a close second.  That is why I have chosen to work at a school that is not high pressure and where I can spend significant time with my family.  I love them dearly and often work hard to give them extra goodies, like my wife's new car that was paid for by my summer teaching or my kid's tuition.  But I love my job and could not give up my career for my family.  Although, and this is where most people will see my point, my career could be modified or put on hold temporarily if family needs demanded it.  I spend over 50% of my waking hours in my career.  If this was not my highest value, then why in the heck am I doing it?

As for the rest, I am trying to take the approach of value-dense living and do the things that will get the most bang for the buck.  So some things I list may be high in value, but take little time because I have learned how to be extra efficient at it.

Kid update

Things around the home are going well.  In school, my eldest started Kindergarten at South Arbor Charter Academy.  He's loving it there.  Every day he has fun projects to show us.  Yesterday, he loved his music class so much, he said and I quote "It blew my mind!"  He's also started soccer and enjoying it much more this year than last.  His first game is this Saturday.

My middle child is still attending Greenhouse Montessori, but is now in the older classroom for 3+.  On the weekend, she's taking dance class, learning ballet and tap.  Sometimes its hard to tell what here interests are as she plays with her big brother so much.  Is it really something she likes or just something that her brother likes that she thinks might be kinda interesting?  Those two do love playing together and will often be gone for an hour or two playing before we see them again.  Mom and Dad must be too boring.

My youngest is rapidly approaching 18 months of age.  Still waiting for him to start talking more.  Most likely it will come in a flood when it hits.  He understands tons of stuff and always, always wants to know the name of things.  He's fascinated with any mechanical thing that moves - cars, trucks, planes, trains, bikes, etc.  He also seems to be getting over his jealousy a bit.  For the past couple months, he's been trying to push his older brother and sister off of our laps any time they sat there.  It was as if mommy's and daddy's lap were his.  After a few crying fits, he's starting get that he is not the boss of our laps.

Are irrational values of value?

Last night at our monthly GLO meeting, we discussed the first 1/4 of Ayn Rand's The Objectivist Ethics.  One of our members raised the following question:  "Are irrational values of value?"  After almost 30 minutes of conversation, we hardly resolved the issue. The major confusion stems from the dual sense that values is used within Objectivism.  According to Rand, a value is that which one acts to gain and/or keep.  Based on this sense of value, even a junky pursuing his latest fix is pursing a value - since they are acting to gain something.  However, in the second sense, values must support the objective standard of life.  The concept of life is what makes the concept of value possible. 

Clearly, however, a junky acting to gain a fix is pursing an irrational action because it is ultimately self-destructive.  If the value chosen ends the life in question, it must be irrational.  Yet, humans do sometimes chose self-destructive actions.  Can we call these irrational actions "of value" in the objective sense?

As Rand reminds us, whenever we talk of value, you must ask of value to whom and for what?  In other words, you have to understand the context.  So the question "Are irrational values of value?" must demand an answer to "To whom?" and "For what?"  The full question should be "Are irrational values of value to man for living?"  The answer is obviously "NO!!!"   Is a junky seeking a fix a value to him for living?  No.  However, using a different context such as "Is a junk seeking a fix of value to him for a temporary joy?"  You might answer yes, with a major disclaimer - to what end?  Certain, the fix will meet an immediate desire, but does nothing to help the long-term survival of the individual. 

My take away - the question "Are irrational values of value?" can only be answered by "depends on the context", but according to an objective standard - No.

Understanding the two senses of value is by no means an easy task.  But after last night, I believe I have a better grasp of the concepts involved.  Many thanks to Robert Nasir, Alex Hrin, and the other GLO members who helped me think through this question.

What does a professor do all day?

As I am sure, many of my non-faculty friends have no clue what I do all day.  The most visible aspect to my job is showing up in a classroom.  At my school, we teach on a 3/3 load, meaning we teach three classes every semester.  That translates into 9 hours per week.  If that is all outsiders see, they may think we have tons of free time.  So where does the rest of my time go?  Here's my personal breakdown:

On good semesters, I only have to prep for 2 classes (when two of the three courses I teach are the same).  If I have taught the classes before, prep time is very minimal, maybe an hour at most for each class.  Given that I'm pretty new to teaching and I do a bit more experimenting in my class, the time usually amounts to 2-4 hours a week of prepping.  Grading also takes a chunk of time usually somewhere around 2-4 hours a week, though it varies greatly.  On average, prep and grading combined runs about 8 hours a week.  So far, that's roughly 17 hours of a 40 hour work week.

What about the other half?  I personally attempt to allocate at least 1 full day a week to research, often Friday.  At more research intensive schools, that would not be enough, but it suffices for me here at EMU.  That brings the running total to 25 hours a week.  The remaining time is split pretty evenly between committee meetings (2 hours), meeting with students (1 hours), advising the department club (1 hours), investigating technology news (2 hours), answering emails (2 hours), and collaborating with other faculty (3 hours).  Throw in the occasional article review, textbook evaluation, blog post, student recommendation, grant proposal, and conference and my weeks become full.

Well, its full for the 8 months of our contract.  In the spring and summer semesters, my schedule varies considerably.  Two summers ago, I spent most of my time at home because of our new baby.  I did teach one class in the evenings, but that was about it.  Last summer, I spent the spring semester teaching two classes.  One of which was a new class, so I spent a good 40 hours a week just prepping, teaching, and grading.  In the summer semester, I worked half days for the most part, completing some research that I wanted to submit before the beginning of the fall semester.

Well, that's my life in a nutshell.  There are an endless supply of time sucking activities to do in academia.  I would like to become a bit more productive at my work, so as to free up time for new projects - developing a series of online classes, starting a business (or two), writing a textbook (or two), consulting, or even conducting more research projects.  Part of my focus this semester will be on improving my productivity in all areas and when possible eliminating time sucking activities that produce little value.